why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize