wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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