In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
