Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
In the future we'll all be gay
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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