If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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