i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
