Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
