i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
