Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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