the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
