The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
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