Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize