you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
