I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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