Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Randomize
