From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
two words...techno handjob
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
