I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Semen is not good for contacts.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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