Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
