why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
She has the best kind of daddy issues
These tits shall not be calmed
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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