I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
