I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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