You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
