I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize