So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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