oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize