My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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