Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
We were destined to go to rehab together
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize