At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
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