you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
