i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Randomize
