Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
