If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize