totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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