dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
