Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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