Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
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I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
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I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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