i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize
