Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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