they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize