Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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