i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
