Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
