Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
