I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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