we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
