My nipple is on Facebook.
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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