we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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