i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
COCAINE IS GR8
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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