Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Randomize
