just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
