would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
The struggles of a small town man whore
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize