Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Randomize
